Miss Piggy is the original Head Bitch in Charge. She is the beginning and the end- the Alpha and the Omega. The Queen, The Princess and the Dutchess of all things fly. Today we choose to honor Miss Piggy for her attitude, style, relationship, grace and gumption.
1- Sex Symbol: Yall don’t know about Miss Piggy. She is plus-size playboy. Clearly men and women adore her.
2- Attitude: PWA: Piggies with Attitude. She’s charming and she’ll put you in your place. She doesn’t take your shit but you better take hers. She’ll switch up in a heartbeat.
3- Style: She is clean as the board of health. She is shinier than Mr. Clean’s head. You have never seen Ms. Piggy look busted. Her weave is an aspirational weave. We can only aspire to have a weave as silky and smooth as hers one day.
4- Lover at Heart: She loves Kermit more than anything. You gotta love a woman that stands by her man. She will cut you, over Kermit.
5- Bitch on the Streets: Who does Piggy think she is that we have to call her by a title? She’s the only person in the Muppets whose name is Miss- miss anything. She will put you in your place, talk about you behind your back and demand that you still love her.
6- Classic Cadillac: She’s ancient. She is older than Cleopatra. If we opened a tomb and looked in the great pyramid there would be a rib bone that Miss Piggy ate, because she is still alive.
Miss Piggy. Get on her level- go head Miss Piggy, go head.